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Tuesday, March 20, 2007

The Dog and the Dud

We are the only Church in America that has hired a full time staff person to come and get you... if you skip church... We have too many people who are making too many excuses when it comes to church attendance.

We've hired Dog the Bounty Hunter who is a professional bounty hunter to lead this ministry. So the next time Sunday rolls around and for some weak reason you choose to skip church... expect a knock on your door.

I know some of you actually doubt that this story is true, but I guarantee you that no matter how important that I personally feel about people skipping church, I know that GOD is FAR MORE CONCERNED WITH OUR CHURCH ATTENDENCE THAN I WILL EVER BE.

Jesus actually gave his life for the Church. Let's make sure that we never give Dog the Bounty hunter a chance to come visit us....

*Parts of this story were written with a "grain of salt."


AM said...

Good, good to know that the BIG DOGS are in the house!

FYI, does attending the Vine Count?
Great Word! Perfect place for young adults.

SeaLifeLover said...

Pastor, I have to share something with you. I have been giving to the church for years, but since this sermon series has started, I have been serious about giving a true 10% for the first time. I have felt blessed for many years, but I can't even believe what has happened now. I am amazed. I can't wait to tell my LIFE Group tonight.

I have been TERRIFIED to check my bank balance all week because I have given a lot this month, not only in terms of tithing, but I've given to a few other sources as well. I knew inside that God would see me through because God knows what I'm doing with my money. Still, I admit, I was afraid.

Last night I had to go to the ATM to take out $20 for parking at an event for work I attended, and I was praying that there would be enough in there. That's how tight I thought I was. And actually, by this time every month, it's usually running a bit low. But in light of having given quite a bit, I would be lower.

I haven't paid all of my bills yet for the month because I gave some of my money away, which I thought was more important at this time. I was going to push some of them off until the 1st if necessary.

This morning I knew it was time to assess the damage. I had to look. I prayed and signed in to my account...

I had almost $1500 dollars in there, Pastor. There is no reasonable explanation for this. I cannot understand it! I am just praising God! How can this be!?!

I have now paid a few of my bills and will pay more later today. I am sincerely shocked and awed by the Lord. PRAISE the Lord. I just wanted to share this story with you. I have tested the Lord, and look what has happened! Amen!

Another Soldier For Christ said...

AM, as long as your are being filled it doesnt matter what service you go to. What matters is that you have a continual, growing relationship with our Lord and Savior; for if you do not, you can begin to faulter in your faith and become easy pray for satans attacks. As it states in I Peter 5:8-11, "Be self-controlled and alert. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. Resist him, standing firm in the faith, because you know that your brothers throughout the world are undergoing the same kind of sufferings. And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast. To him be the power for ever and ever. Amen."